Saturday, August 26, 2006

Culture Shock

Culture shock is not wearing off. Quite the opposite: it is intensifying.

Police. Girls. Dancing. Crime. Climate. Food. Everything is different in ways that are so hard to quantify that often you don't even notice them initially. They become steadily more apparent the longer you stick around, until you suddenly turn around and think, "hang on, I thought I understood that but I don't at all!"

It's hard at times. But as a confirmed challenge-addict, I think that's what I like about it. As long as I'm allowed to let off steam at times. So my anti-Whatever rants on here shouldn't be taken too seriously :).

Friday, August 25, 2006

Dancing

You spend your entire teenagehood going out to venues which play loud music in order to meet girls. Some people mistake the means for the end and keep going out even if they already have a partner. Few people make this mistake, but since those people stay in the places, while the others find their girl and move on, they make up a sizable proportion of those in the club.

In your late 20s, you've worked it out. You basically know how to dance, or more to the point how to behave, in a variety of late-night, loud-music, alcohol-fuelled situations. In my case, a combination of the metal clubs of my teenage years and the drum'n'bass and techno clubs of my brighton years, added to which a smattering of gay clubs, led me to behave in a certain ways in venues characterized by loud repetitive beats and stroboscopic lighting.

Then, you come to a different culture. You might, for instance, find yourself in Bogota. You continue, out of habit, to consume beer and come to nightspots. However, insidiously, everything is different. You thought it was all about getting drunk and dancing like a ponce with your mates! Or perhaps you thought it was all about getting drunk, dancing like a ponce with your mates, and picking up a random girl (also drunk and dancing with her mates, perhaps less like a ponce and more like a pissed bint.)

But no. In fact, these nightspots are an excuse for the local youth, who all live with their parents and don't believe in sex before marriage, to simulate sex with their partners on the dancefloor. I believe that the theory is that if you do it in a public place, it can't be bad. True enough, everyone keeps their clothes on, but beyond that there is some serious groin proximity going on.

Of course, being a northern European, I think dance music is about a 4/4 beat and dancing in lines facing the DJ. I feel like an alien here. Dancing is about knowing what you're doing. It's also about simulating sex. Actually, although you might think latin music or salsa is fun and exotic, after you've watched some hot latin girls dancing with their pimply or mustachioed boyfriends on the dance floor a few times, you really wish they would go home and just have sex in their houses like civilised human beings, and leave the dancefloors for people to just have fun!

Obviously, I don't really know how to dance Salsa. But even if i did, i have to say that i reject the whole idea of musical sex on the dancefloor. People say its not about sex, and that I am a silly Brit to think so. Then I ask why I can't dance with a man, and they say "because that would be gay!" Case closed.

I wonder if my own culture will seem weird on my return, or whether it will be a welcome breath of fresh air. I'll say one thing though: I intend to go clubbing, and I intend to dance and have fun. What a revolutionary idea!

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Love is a piano

"Love is a piano
dropped out a fourth-storey window
and I am in the wrong place
at the wrong time."

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Safe Colombia

From MarketWatch:

"Uribe's rigid stance against guerrillas and his peace plan with far-right paramilitary groups have helped bring down Colombia's murder rate to a near two-decade low, kidnappings declined nearly 78% over four years, and armed rebel attacks on villages have been nearly eliminated, according to Defense Ministry figures."

Friday, August 04, 2006

regresando

So the date is finally set. On Tuesday October 17, I catch an Air Madrid flight to Madrid, and the next day connect with an Easyjet flight which gets me to Gatwick at 2215 Wednesday night.

This should be plenty of time to manage to make it to Beth's wedding on the 21st, and not get the biggest Wag point of all time by being in the wrong continent and missing it.

I have booked a return flight for the 6th of November, which should give me a few weeks to say hi to the UK and see some fireworks, before coming back here to continue my southward peregrinations!